My MS, Not Yours

So I’ve written about the many stages of MS exacerbation and diagnosis. All that suffer with this disease might not be a carbon copy of one another, due to such wide variations of this disease. But at the five minutes prior to the doctor’s diagnosis, each of us are the exactly same.

We are tense, confused, and expecting the worst. We white knuckle the imminent words that shall be spoken.   Kind of like a slow motion train wreck. I’m sure each doctor has their own delivery for such news. Some sympathetic, but then some maybe sterile and authoritative. The words sink into some, very fast, yet others like an escalator. But we all have the same thought when we hear multiple sclerosis.

Many patients, “oh trust me you are a patient”, we interpret as MS being a Jerry’s kid disease or another well publish Hollywood disease.

But actually none of us have a freaking clue! But our human instinct is to dwell with the bad or horrible side first. We predict canes, wheelchairs, and maybe even nursing homes or at best a good looking home healthcare nurse. We assume the worst. Our understanding can be overwhelming. We begin to search for info as well as support groups and other patients, We dwell on what will happen. In no way I’m I a neurologist, psychiatrist or a Priest.  I’m in no way comparable to many. I’m quick to my opinion and I rarely create a plan”B”. I feel that a simple statement might have set the tone of my disease. I firmly believe solidified my mental state and my direction.

Now if you disagree with me, you probably didn’t try it. Remember, this is my MS , not yours. So here’s my secret, this is what might have shocked the doctor….. I said , are you ready…. “Thank You God!”. I can handle this. How can I complain of MS when so many children will never live half my years? “Thank You God I have MS and you spared my family. I can handle it.” Just Thank You God .Thank you for my MS , it has taken me twenty years to get to this point and say “I get it” , I just plain get it. Mark Twain wrote once “There are only two days that matter in a person’s life, The day he is born, and second the day he knows why” I have MS but MS does not have me.