Swagger of a Cripple

Cripple- 1. a person or animal partially or totally unable to use one or more limbs.
2. anything that is impaired or flawed.
3. a wounded animal, usually shot by a hunter.

Okay, okay, okay..

I am a cripple, but I embrace it and I have my fun with it... so much fun. This is how it all developed:
The right side of my body is the weaker half, most likely I have lesions on the left side of my brain causing this anomaly. Several ailments combined has contributed to the way I walk.

1. Spasms in my thigh and calf
2. Foot drop
3. Laziness

I doubt that my limp could have been prevented, but possibly delayed if I had only done a few, simple exercises, but you can't unscramble scrambled eggs... so I roll with it.

I was told early on in my journey with MS to stretch and this simple act alone would offer limberness to my spastic muscles. I have exercised at times, but I was never dedicated to doing it faithfully. So if you throw foot drop, where by my foot does not allow appropriate clearance of the ground during my strides, and combined atrophy of muscles, intensifying weakness of my appendage....

Guess what you get?

Well it might sound sad, but it is kinda funny to watch. The severity of my condition I take responsibility for, but hey... I get some great jokes out of it. And so do my friends and family.

It's funny how most folks assume it is a bum knee issue. Depending on my schedule, I might leave it at that, nod and carry on with what I am doing. But if I have the time, I like to have a little fun. So my lame leg might become the injury of the USC match, where I refused to tap out.  Or I might have hurt it in a bungee jumping accident where it was stretched longer than my left leg.

The reality of my condition, it makes my strides shorter, and my speed unrushed. I must constantly scan the ground searching for even the smallest items my right leg might not have the ability to clear. And let's face it - I'm way too pretty and way too cool to use a walking cane.

Now if you combine a lame leg with my balance issues consistent with MS, what do you have? Well it's a controlled fall, that most people close to me are surprised when I actually don't fall. But honestly, I'd rather have the leg - the lame leg - than to have none at all.

True, I limp. True, I have trouble with hills and stairs. True, I could never kick a field goal. But what I do have is unique. It's totally mine.

Call it what you want.. I just try to keep it simple. Yeah, I'm pretty cool.. but this is the swagger of cripple.